Sometimes I'm Strong
by Red-Like-Lithium
Summary: ...and sometimes, it gets to be too much. {FaithShipping}


_A/N: I do not own Yu-Gi-Oh! 5Ds or the cover image! Credit to the original artist. But I DO own what I've written!_

_Starts out with one-sided PsychicShipping, then mutual-sort-of FairthShipping.  
__The path of Aki's understanding of what love is. I appreciate reviews^_^ Enjoy~_

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**Sometimes I'm Strong**

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That black rose always sat there on the table, right between us.

We ate together.

I don't know why. Perhaps he truly was _that_ obsessive, _that _desperate to control my being. Maybe he was unstable himself and couldn't bear to be alone for too long. After all, there was a lot I didn't know about him, looking back. Even his last name remained a mystery - that is, if he had one.

We'd sit in a room alone at a single table, long and wooden and polished to the point that it was excessive. He always folded his hands beneath his chin, like the cliché villain in movie. His dark, murky green eyes never left my body. It was disturbing, but I never gave it a second thought. At the time, I thought it was the closest thing I'd ever get to love. He cared enough to gaze at my form for the entire dinner. And that was good enough for me.

He'd ask how my day was. He always received the same answer.

"Like any other."

He'd smile, more of a smirk than a kind one. "How nice."

We would eat in silence, only accompanied by the soft _ting_ of of silverware on glass plates and the sound of an occasional cough from the man across the stand. It wasn't comfortable. It wasn't inviting or something I looked forward to. It just _was_. I never got used to it, but it was never a surprise. It was normal, yet it was hardly that.

And there was always - _always _\- a single, wilted blossom in the center of table. A black rose, the wax from it's petals long dried and left to sit there, eternally dead.

It was like this every night.

I'd eat breakfast alone and lunch alone, but dinner was with Divine, whether I liked it or not. Well, not that I ever retorted.

But one of these repetitive nights was different from the others.

It was a day when I'd lost control of my abilities, resulting in the destruction of a few buildings in the city. I was supposed to be the Witch, the heartless creature who killed for the fun of it, to quench an alien blood-thirst. However, I was still rather bad at this. I may have been damn broken at the time, but I still had the remnants of a conscience that would make its appearance once in a while. It was just one of those days.

I didn't know if I'd accidentally murdered anyone. And I honest to God feared the answer. I had not even asked Divine; he probably would have found a route around the answer, anyway.

"Is something wrong, Aki?"

I hadn't said a thing, hadn't even looked at him. But I knew he was looking at me. He always was.

We sat in silence for a few more minutes. I'd barely eaten a thing while his platter was half-empty. Did I envy that about him? How he could see past the sins people had committed and consume a meal like a normal person? Years later, I scorned myself for considering such a thing.

He persisted to ask once more, to which I shook my head.

What made my spine go erect and my fingers turn numb and my heart skip a beat or two was when I heard his chair screech against the floor. Soon his footsteps were coming toward me. I refused to give him the satisfaction he wanted and took a sip of my water, uninterested in what he was doing. But on the inside, I continued to fear. And for the life of me, I couldn't understand why. After all, Divine was the only person I trusted, right? He was all I had.

"Aki..."

The tone of his voice made me shiver. He sounded concerned, yet somehow, I _knew_ he wasn't. And it angered me; yet I just sat and allowed him to say what he wished. I'd put my faith in him long ago. I sure as hell wasn't going to shatter that at the voicing of two syllables.

I felt his fingers touch my cheek and cringed inwardly. He cupped my face delicately, in a way that unsettled my very being. Finally, I moved my eyes to glare at him directly. He was smiling, and that scared me.

I still didn't know why I was so uneasy.

It took another few years for me to realize just how afraid I had been. After the Fortune Cup and the downfall of Arcadia, I would come to see that I had been truly and utterly petrified.

But at the time, I had only been confused and..._tired_. Tired of all of the things that had built up to that moment. Tired of being constantly rejected by the world. Because in the end, Divine was all I had for a home.

So I took it all.

When he crashed his lips onto mine so forcefully that I was startled to the very core, shaken and hindered useless. My eyes were wide and empty of that sparkle people claim is present during your first kiss. Hell, this wasn't even a kiss since I wasn't returning it. I just endured as he stayed that way for an uncomfortable amount of time. Soon I could feel his tongue, and I was still on the edge of my seat, quivering in a way that Divine would not have detected.

When he was gone, leaving me to eat in quiet, his gaze never trailing from me until the door was shut, I asked myself over and over again why I was crying.

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Divine was dead.

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I asked myself over and over again...why I was crying...

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Perhaps it was the fact that the relationship with my parents was still on uneven ground, but I had to escape that house sometimes. And it usually led to me wandering aimlessly around Neo Domino. Or winding up at the twins' place. They were a happy, refreshing sort of company.

I'd heard from Rua and Ruka about a week or two ago that Yuusei, Jack, and Crow were finally returning from the Satellite, and that they were going to attempt to find a place to live. Since then, I hadn't asked how their progress was. If anything, they were already settled and I'd just been too timid to inquire about it. Thinking about it now, I came to the conclusion that they were already long within the city.

The atmosphere had gotten somewhat tense back 'home', and I'd become fed up. It wasn't that I blamed Mama and Papa, but at times, we just ran thin on our bond. And I was usually the one to walk out so everyone could cool down a little.

But tonight probably wasn't a good one to walk alone. Especially when one gets lost.

Not that I was lost.

More like...turned around?

It was a rougher part of the city, though not the ghetto section quite yet. Not many people were out, and the structures were all smaller and less impressive than the skyscrapers downtown were. It wasn't that is was a dangerous area...just not a place a woman should be caught by herself. I decided not to panic.

Or at least, not until I heard the first crack of thunder.

Damn the forecast.

I wasn't even wearing appropriate clothing for rain. Just my usual attire, the one I hadn't given up even after Arcadia. Victorian style, which I'd always thought was pretty. However, my tastes in dress hardly mattered then, because the first big drops of liquid were beginning to fall. Heavy and random, but extremely slowly growing in numbers.

Now I was panicking. But just a little.

For another half an hour, I rushed up and down streets, trying desperately to find a way back to my house. Exasperation was beginning to set in, like the cold chattering my bones. The thunder was a never ending rumble, and was drowned out by the rain eventually.

It was pouring.

I was soaked.

And I was pissed.

After a while of this, I found myself at the gaping entry to an alley, under a sort of makeshift overhang that blocked about two thirds of the water. It was freezing and wet and the sky was darkened from the clouds even though it was the afternoon. Gritting my teeth, I wordlessly seethed at my luck, at my stupidity for leaving home when I knew it would be like this yet I'd so foolishly forgotten momentarily. Maybe it was because I was intensely frigid or the fact that the storm didn't look to be letting up anytime soon, but I was mad and disgusted with the world.

Disgusted with myself.

Disgusted with what I had done with life up to this point, for joining the Movement, for giving into everything that bastard of a man Divine had pleased, for being who I _was_.

I held back the tears, though. I wasn't this weak, I had buried the thought immediately.

For a stretch of time I'd lost track of, I stood there, waiting out the weather, miserable and betrayed by God, who never seemed to be done tormenting me. Selfish to think, yes, but that long of standing and waiting while cold and quaking tends to take a real toll.

"..."

Someone was looking at me, but I ignored it. People had already gone by with umbrellas and resistant coats, glancing at my pitiful sight and scurrying off. It was just another half-interested pedestrian-

"Aki."

"What?" I snapped, whipping my head to the side, sodden strands of hair sticking to my face and neck. I regretted the tone instantly.

He didn't have an umbrella like I'd seen from others, but he was wearing a thick coat to shield himself from the merciless downpour. His hair was wet like mine, but it didn't seem to faze him. "What are you doing in weather like this?"

I admittedly winced at the audible disbelief and - was that irritation? - in his voice. "I...got turned around..."

Yuusei blinked, frowning deeply in a way I couldn't understand. I didn't move, pausing for him to give up on me and leave. I knew he would.

But I've been wrong before. Many times, in fact.

I stared in complete astonishment as Yuusei set down the bag he was holding, shouldering off his long coat. His clothes beneath were drenched within seconds, meaning a t-shirt that could not have been very warm in any universe. His jeans were, too. I went rigid as he pried me from the wall gently, wrapping the coat around my body and beginning to button it up rapidly to avoid any more drops in my overall temperature. He peered up at me. "What were you thinking?"

I couldn't reply. Mostly because I wasn't sure is he was annoyed or not.

"Aki," Yuusei sighed heavily. "...You're going to get sick. Come on, I'll take you home."

I blinked away some water that was beginning to slide down into my eyes, realizing that some of the liquid on my lips wasn't fresh and earthy, but _salty_. I shook my head vigorously, moving to give him back his jacket. But a hand on my shoulder stopped me from moving, nonviolently forcing the fabric against my skin so I couldn't get it off. His face was hard to read. But I was almost positive there was concern in his unyielding gaze.

"I'm used to nasty weather," he murmured, pulling the coat closer around me and continuing to clasp buttons. When I tried to escape his tender grasp, Yuusei merely restrained my movements as gently as possible. I was extremely confused by this point and just wanted him to _leave_.

"Go away...please..."

He shook his head once and finished fastening his rainproof clothing. Yuusei kept his hands on my arms, though, and stared at me, eyes calm and betraying nothing. "Aki, did something happen?"

"..._Please_."

But damn that bastard, he didn't move an inch. Instead, he tilted his head to the side a tiny bit, eyebrows knitting in uncertainty. "...Aki...you're crying."

There was no getting away from him.

Because I knew Yuusei would track me to the end of the Earth to help me up if I happened to fall.

And that's what puzzled me to the full extent. He hardly knew me, even after all this time. He'd been in the Satellite for three months now. This was actually the first time I'd seen him since the Dark Signer War. And of course, he had to show up when I was at my lowest.

After a long, drawn out pause of complete silence, I found my voice. It was weak and cracking, but I managed. "...Sometimes...it gets to be too much, Yuusei..."

The look on his face was next to heartbreaking. Which was strange, because his composure didn't change all that much. Perhaps I was growing to understand him a little more, _read_ him. His lids fell slightly, giving his cobalt eyes a more humane appearance. I felt him lean into me, face so close that much of the precipitation no longer fell between the gap. His tone was quiet and held a lingering sense of insecurity. "I know...I know, Aki... I know what it's like to feel overwhelmed, like you can't handle everything that's been dropped into your arms..."

I couldn't say a thing.

Not before I felt him brush away a few loose strands of burgundy hair from my face.

Yuusei's lips pressed against my forehead softly, like kissing an injured knee on a young child. My eyes widened and more tears fell unwillingly. But after a moment, the pain seemed to ease into a dull ache that faded into me, leaving me cold and shivering. It was like he was kissing a wound better - only it was a wound of the heart. _My_ heart.

Not after he stepped back, grip tightening enough so it didn't hurt, nevertheless getting his point across.

"But Aki...you're _strong_."

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Years later, I realize that I never did say another word that night.

I had allowed Yuusei to bring me back, though not before he made absolute positive that I was emotionally ready to reenter my home. His excuse to my parents was that we'd run into each other downtown and then the storm had hit, after which we'd hurried back. Hideo and Setsuko still believe that to this day.

But I smile to myself as I sit down at my desk and pick up the phone.

A list of patients is there when I peer down, proceeding to dial the number. I have a quick break before I'm needed again - unless an emergency happens, which it very well could. I lean back in my swivel chair, white clothe falling off the seat a little. I fiddle with my name tag, reading '_Izayoi-sensei_'.

When he answers, he only gets out the first part of the greeting word. "Hel-"

"Thank you."

There's a brief second of wordless quiet, which is broken by a chuckle. "What's this about, Aki?"

I smile. "I guess...for everything."

Yuusei doesn't seem to understand completely - after all, it _had _been quite a few years ago. But he goes along with it. Before they hang up, he says something, though.

"Aki...thank _you_."

The line goes dead.

And I am left speechless.

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_~Finish~_


End file.
